Wishful Thinking

I took Jacob to the dentist the other night. I had remembered at the last moment that I forgot to mention that he was going through treatment and was nervous about having to shake my head no when they asked "Is he going to be okay?"

As we waited we sat across the table from each other. Jacob asked if we could go get "the train wreck" at Denny's. I asked, "You mean the Grand Slam at Perkins?" He smiled and nodded his head yes. 

Then I woke up.

The dream didn't really make any sense. But I was with Jacob, for just a moment, and it felt like a little visit from him. 

I'm often reminded of a short-lived television show called Awake. I only saw one episode of it and was fascinated with the premise. Michael lives in two separate realities after a car accident. In one reality, his wife  survives the accident; in the other reality, his son  survives. Michael does not know which reality is "real". 

Sometimes I wish for two different realities. The days of suffering would be so much easier to handle if every night I lived a life where Jacob was still with us.