Coming or Going?

I seriously feel like I'm not sure whether I'm coming or going around this house. Today Jacob and I made the 140 mile round trip to the hospital to see if his numbers were high enough for the stem cell harvest. They weren't. As we were getting ready to leave Jacob had to go potty. As he finished I heard his little voice behind the bathroom door, "Mom?" I opened the door to see a toilet full of blood.

Keeping calm for him I told him to finish wiping and not to flush. I told a nurse what had happened and everyone seemed to be flying by at once...calling doctors, checking the potty, getting a room ready for him. Luckily, it turns out that it is a fissure, which is the best possible scenario for this...though there is now a risk of infection. He was hooked up to fluids for 2 1/2 hours and then sent home with ointment. That is one scene that a mother never wants to see. :(

We will be heading back on Thursday to recheck the counts and see if it's time to harvest. We will either spend the night then or come back on Friday for the start of another 5 day chemotherapy stay. I've decided that we will try one 24 hour shift with hubby at the hospital and myself at home. Hubby is willing, but Jacob balks at the thought...I think he will see that daddy can be fun and daddy can find out that sleeping on those chairs aren't fun!

On top of all this, Jacob has been sick over 24 hours with nausea and vomiting. We aren't sure if it is a bug, but I'm beginning to suspect that maybe it's the antibiotics he was on - and thankful he finished them this evening. Hoping and praying that he feels better tomorrow.

I'm off to work on my to-do list for tomorrow. It may be one of the only days in a week that I will be home to get things done.